Let’s Be Real.

by | Aug 1, 2019 | Blog Posts, Mindset, Self-Compassion, Uncategorized | 0 comments

Have you seen this place before?

It’s nicknamed the “Gates of Heaven” and it’s on the eastern coast of Bali.

Spoiler alert…


That picture is FAKE.

People wait in line for hours to get a picture taken WITH A MIRROR.

(When I was there, the wait would’ve been 90-120 minutes.)


My friend snapped that picture, blocking someone posing behind me.

That’s what it really looks like. Worn tile with patchy grass on either side.

(And a mismatched sarong you’re given to wear on temple grounds.)

In my last post, I talked about how jealousy can positively direct us towards what we want in our lives.

(Want more connection, organization, adventure…? Great! What can you do to get more of that?)

Jealousy tells us what we want AND…it’s not always rooted in reality.

How can you USE IT and then LOSE IT?


Next time you’re scrolling, scrolling, scrolling and see a picture that pains you, remember the Gates of Heaven.

What you see may not be real.

(Even if it is, it might not be worth your envy.)

  • That 4th of July parade pic looks perfect…but there was a meltdown moments later.
  • That holiday dinner looks magazine-worthy…but the conversation was about the weather.
  • That colleague’s career is on a fast-track…but her heart is broken and she can’t get out of bed on the weekends.

Use it and lose it: Once you’ve let jealousy teach you (what you want more of in your own life), how can you let it go?

Zoom out.

Ask yourself “what’s the bigger picture?” (Pun intended.)

You might actually find more cause for compassion than jealousy.


☝?That’s me, on top of a volcano, after a very intense sunrise hike. Only there wasn’t a lake. My friend used the back of a second iPhone to make the reflection.

What are you chasing?

Is it your dream or someone else’s?

Is it worthy of your desire or a set-up for disappointment?

It’s not easy to see past the smoke and mirrors.

Like Matt. His parents and older siblings all reached the VP level. He’s always imagined he’d be a VP, too. (And maybe he will someday.) But for now, in talking together, Matt realized he doesn’t want that promotion. There are things he wants to focus on outside of work right now. We’re brainstorming how his current role can be more rewarding until (perhaps) he decides he’s interested in the next level.

If you have an idea for what you want to do next, let’s look at it together.

As a Career & Executive Coach, I often see what others don’t see — and say what others won’t.

I’ll make sure, when you’re taking your next step, you know it’s what you want for real.

Interested in talking about how to work together? Book a complimentary call here. (Or email me at sheila@sheiladevi.com to ask me any questions.)

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